Breakups and the emotions they bring up are complicated.
Breakups can be heartbroken, it can drain their victims emotionally and bring about painful moments with lots of questions.
The feeling of losing someone for whatever reason stays heavy on the heart.
A breakup can be difficult for everyone but there are things you shouldn’t do after a breakup. And you must avoid them.
1) Don’t stalk them on social media
No good will come out of stalking your ex on social media. It’s unhealthy for your growth and can become an obsession.
I have a friend named Rejoice, her boyfriend left her. He said he was no longer interested in the relationship and no longer feeling the vibe.
She was so heartbroken so I encouraged her. I told her a better man will come for her and I also warned her not to call him again or beg him.
She ignored my advice and was stalking this guy on social media. She called him several times and he refused to pick up her call so she went on social media to chat him up begging him and he still rejected her and told her the relationship can no longer work.
I was angry at her because I knew calling or begging him won’t solve anything because he has already made up his mind.
Is not wise to stalk your ex on social media someone that has rejected you. It is a shame to begin to beg him/ her. You are special so don’t belittle yourself by begging and stalking your ex.
2) Don’t isolate yourself
This is the time more than any, to lean on those who love you. Don’t distance yourself from friends and family during this difficult time.
Isolation can be a sign of depression. After a breakup, you need the support of your loved ones. Friends and family are our immediate support system. Spending time with them will help you heal.
Don’t bottle up your emotions. Allow yourself to feel these things because feeling leads to healing. Talk to friends or therapists to make sure you express your feelings.
3) Don’t contact your ex for any reason
Do not for any reason reach out to your ex. You don’t need closure because there is nothing left to talk about.
If you need to give/get things back, ask a friend for help with the exchange or do a drop-off that doesn’t require communication.
No good will come out of stalking your ex on social media. It’s unhealthy for your growth and can become an obsession.
Don’t even ask for their welfare from anyone. You need to let them go and don’t worry about how they are.
4) Don’t beg them
If your partner breaks up with you don’t beg because before they broke up with you, they’ve concluded in their mind . So don’t make the mistake of begging them.
Because they won’t listen to your plea and even if they do out of pity the relationship won’t last they will still break up in the future.
5) Don’t rush into a new relationship
Heal and work on yourself before going into a new relationship. Jumping into a new relationship after a broken relationship is not wise.
6) Don’t degrade yourself
The failure of a relationship does not make you a failure. Some relationships are meant to end to teach you something. There is always a lesson to learn from a broken relationship.
You are still a great person who is worthy of love so don’t see yourself as a failure because of a failed relationship.
7) Don’t make an impulsive decision
Don’t make an impulsive decision because it will turn into something much bigger. Don’t move to a new location or sell your valuables. There are more productive ways to heal.
There is this friend of mine who is married with 2 kids, who also have her own salon. Along the line, her husband slept with her best friend and got her pregnant.
She was really hurt that she sold her salon and left for another location. But unfortunately, that new location wasn’t favorable as the former.
So when things became terrible she left the new location and return back to the previous location to start afresh again because she already sold her previous saloon.
So don’t change location because of a breakup, and don’t sell your valuables.
Final Thoughts
Breakups are tough. First coming to the realization that you are no longer in a relationship isn’t easy. Though the feelings get easier over time, until then, don’t make the mistakes mentioned above.
Because the day your girlfriend or boyfriend broke up with you isn’t the actual day he/she did.
They have broken up with you a long time ago, they were only waiting for the perfect time to break the news to you.
And also what they will tell you the day they will break up with you isn’t the actual reason they are breaking up with you. They will just look for something to say or sometimes even look for a fault in you to use against you.
So when they break up with you, don’t beg them, don’t stalk them on social media, don’t degrade yourself, don’t rush into a new relationship, don’t make impulsive decisions, don’t contact them for any reason and lastly don’t isolate yourself.
