Navigating the dating world can be tricky, and some people—both men and women—use subtle manipulation tactics to maintain control in relationships. While this post isn’t about bashing anyone, it’s important to highlight certain manipulative behaviors that may be present so that you can recognize them and protect yourself. Here are some of the most common manipulative tactics that women may use—without ever admitting to them.
1. Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where someone makes you question your own reality or sanity. In relationships, a woman might deny ever saying something, even though you clearly remember it. This tactic causes you to doubt your own memory, making it harder to stand up for yourself.
2. Bait and Switch
At the start of the relationship, she may present herself in one way to attract you, but once you’re emotionally invested, she changes. Her values, behaviors, and even the way she treats you might shift drastically. This tactic is often about drawing you in with one version of herself, only to reveal another once she feels secure.
3. Love Bombing
In the beginning, she showers you with affection and promises of a future together, making you feel like you’ve found the perfect partner. But once you’re hooked, she pulls back, leaving you to chase after the affection she once freely gave. This puts you in a position of constantly trying to win her approval.
4. Victim Playing
Some women play the victim in every situation, especially when discussing past relationships. By constantly portraying herself as the one who’s been wronged, she manipulates your sympathy and guilt to get you to conform to her desires.
5. The Jealousy Game
One dirty trick involves deliberately flirting with other men in front of you to provoke jealousy and insecurity. The goal is to make you compete for her attention, giving her more control over the relationship dynamics.
6. Withholding Affection
Withholding affection—be it emotional or physical—is another way to manipulate. She might use this as a form of punishment or to get you to agree to her terms. It’s a tactic that can cause confusion and emotional damage, as you’re left wondering what went wrong.
7. The Silent Treatment
Instead of addressing issues directly, she might give you the silent treatment. This passive-aggressive behavior is meant to make you feel guilty and ultimately bend to her will. It’s a way of asserting control without confrontation.
8. The Money Game
Some women use men for financial gain, expecting them to pay for everything without offering anything in return. This manipulation can range from always expecting you to foot the bill to outright asking for money.
9. The Commitment Tease
She dangles the idea of commitment just out of reach, keeping you hopeful that the relationship will get more serious. But in reality, she has no intention of committing, using this tactic to keep you around while maintaining her control.
10. Guilt Tripping
Making you feel guilty for not doing enough, even if you’re already putting in a lot of effort, is a powerful tactic. Whether it’s about not spending enough time with her or meeting her high expectations, she uses guilt to control your behavior.
11. The Comparison Trap
Comparing you to other men, especially exes, friends, or even celebrities, is a way to undermine your self-esteem. This tactic pushes you to conform to her ideal image or make you feel inadequate.
12. Over-Promising
Making big promises about the future without any intention of following through is a way to keep you committed to potential rather than reality. She may talk about long-term plans to give you hope while never delivering.
13. Spy Games
Some women take control to another level by spying on their partner, whether it’s checking phones, emails, or social media accounts. This behavior violates privacy and trust, making it impossible for you to feel secure in the relationship.
14. Hot and Cold Behavior
The emotional roller coaster of running hot and cold keeps you off balance and desperate to regain her affection. This unpredictable behavior ensures that she remains in control, as you never know where you stand.
15. Emotional Blackmail
Using emotional outbursts, threats, or even the possibility of harming herself to manipulate outcomes is a severe tactic. It’s a way to make you feel responsible for her well-being and compliance with her demands.
16. The Ex Card
Constantly bringing up ex-partners as a comparison or to evoke jealousy and insecurity is a way to control your emotions. Whether she’s saying her ex treated her better or suggesting you’re not measuring up, it’s designed to make you feel inadequate.
17. Playing Dumb
Pretending not to understand what she did wrong or what you’re upset about is a tactic to avoid accountability. By playing dumb, she shifts the blame back onto you, making you question whether your complaints are valid.
18. Triangulation
Bringing a third party, such as friends, family, or even another man, into the relationship dynamic to back up her point or make you feel outnumbered is a way to gain an advantage. It can make you feel like you’re the problem or that others are siding with her.
19. Sudden Crisis
She may create or exaggerate a crisis—such as a health scare or emotional breakdown—to test your commitment or distract you from addressing real issues in the relationship. This tactic shifts the focus away from her behavior and gauges how much control she has over you.
20. The Ultimatum Game
Giving ultimatums is a way to force you into a corner. By saying “it’s my way or no way,” she eliminates the possibility of compromise, ensuring that she maintains control over the relationship.
While these tactics aren’t exclusive to women, it’s important to recognize them in any relationship. Knowledge is power, and understanding these manipulative behaviors can help you protect yourself from emotional damage. Relationships should be built on trust, communication, and mutual respect—not manipulation. Stay sharp, stay strong, and don’t let anyone play games with your emotions.
